Dan Moren led me to a couple of articles on adult friendships. Julie Beck wrote an article for the Atlantic laying out the the fact that adults tend to let friendships lapse due to changing circumstances. David Roberts, on Vox, followed up with an article talking about the structural, geographical, and architectural influences on the adult friendship problem. Their description of the problem rings true, making and maintaining adult friendships is tough. I do think it’s worth it though.
Having spent time in a culture where an extended family is a much more literal tribe than it is here in the United States, I think it is isolating to live and work as we do. Loneliness seems to be a problem that is bubbling under the surface, masked by lifestyle fatigue and consumerism. Complaining about the demands of family and friends seems like a normal, if cynical, state of affairs. Perhaps it’s just covering for a deficiency that does not need to exist.